Tuesday, January 19, 2010


"Forgiveness is giving up all hope of having a better past." --Lily Tomlin

I find it hard to forgive for two reasons. One is that I often associate forgiveness with condoning someone's behavior toward me.

The second is there is some part of me that believes if I let go of an event, that somehow I will develop amnesia about it and find myself in a similar situation at a later date. Like I will somehow lose the lesson if I let go of the event.

Multiply this times 45 years and you get a bunch of friggin baggage.

It's time to unpack.

I find myself wandering back to the stories I tell myself (previous post). And the resulting beliefs from those stories. Such as if I forgive, I'm condoning the act and if I forget, I will repeat my mistake and find myself in another emotional jackpot. These are beliefs that are direct results of the stories I tell myself.

I've come to realize that forgiveness is an essential part of self care.

I've come to realize I teach others how to treat me.

Therefore, if I'm honoring my true self (as opposed to my ego self), I will attract more positive events and relationships into my life.

I'll let you know how it goes. :)


  1. Woman you are so wise! I look forward to your progress, remember you are strong and you are loved by many!!!

  2. The thing that has helped me most with foregivenss is realizing it's a gift I am giving myself. I forgive another so I no longer have to carry the 'energy' of the anger/betrayal/-insert emotion here-. Forgiveness is a gift to me. I dont want to be an angry person - release it - I forgive them. I don't want to be someone who can be betrayed - forgive them - and release that energy.

  3. I agree with the other comments. Forgiveness is a great thing, but it doesn't mean you have to forget.

  4. Thanks for your thoughts, Mea. :)